Writers block and the critic in my head.

I’ve been suffering through the worst case of writers block I’ve ever had and by suffering I mean suffering. Why is it that the voice in my head that puts the breaks on my creativity is so strong and so mean? Really, if some one else spoke to me the way the critic in my head does I’d bitch slap them. Yet I routinely speak to myself in this damaging way. Also, why is creativity the one area that this nasty cow still has so much power? 

I can give her the boot when it comes to friendships, parenting, body image, partnership and every other area of my life, but writing? She can send the author in me almost catatonic. And I’m not kidding when I say it hurts. I’ve been forcing myself to write this last week, refusing to give in to her and there has been moments when she has been screaming so loud that I’m crying as I write. 

She raises her head whenever something matters to me, whenever I get passionate about a goal, there she is dragging me down. She no longer plagues me with my textile art, but I have to wonder if I beat her there or if the reason I’m no longer that inspired by my art is because she beat me?